Pouring Perfect Guinness

Pouring Guinness is an art form, one free from the arguments about "is this achieving anything worthwhile?"  Anyone who'd argue that Guinness isn't worthy is automatically dismissed from any discussion, and probably wasn't invited anywhere to discuss things in the first place.  The St. James' Gate brewery in Dublin is a Temple Of Guinness, a lovingly maintained testament to the most popular stout in the world, and there's no better place to learn this vital lifeskill.

 

The fifth floor is home to the "Perfect Pour" class, a warm bar and warmer staff overlooking the cityscape and students alike.  I spent the most pleasant quarter hour imaginable being instructed in the art, then enjoying the results - quite the best pint I've ever had.  Here's the six-step procedure.

 

1.  Check your glass - you musn't mar perfection with even a speck of dirt.  This seems like a simple step, but it imparts the correct attitude to proper pouring, as well as making sure it's a proper Guinness glass.  Using the wrong glass is an easy mistake to make at a busy bar (especially since the best bars are often busy).  Science hasn't detected the mechanism whereby pints pour and taste better from their own glasses, but only because it doesn't have to.

 

2.  Hold the glass under the tap at 45° to get the best head.  Guinness without a head is known by another name: abject failure.  Make sure the harp symbol is on the side facing you.

 

3.  Pull the handle the full 90°, building a big head with the full 80/20 N2/CO2 gas mixture, holding the tap just clear of the inside surface of the glass so as not to interfere with the drink or create hygiene issues.  Start straightening the glass when the drink hits the base of the harp, leveling off to finish pouring halfway up it.

 

4.  Leave to settle for 119.5 seconds, which is extremely accurate sounding but outside of alcoholic emergencies two minutes is fine.  Enjoy the iconic settling effect in the glass, a sight sure to stir any soul. After this you may hold it up to the light and forever dispel the myth of "the black stuff", discovering that it's actually an extraordinarily rich ruby red.

 

5.  Back under the tap, push the handle forward to top up without any extra gas - the head's ready, you just want more drink now.  Stop short of filling the glass because the head will grow a little more because it's been stirred up.

 

6.  Enjoy. 

 

Smell the drink, swirl it, then smell again - it should be much stronger as you've broken bubbles in the head to release the full aroma.  Don't try this with a full glass (I'm sure you can work out some way of emptying part of the pint).  You'll taste the sweetness on the tip of your tongue, the rich roasted flavor across the middle, and the bitterness in the back of the throat, all evolving after a drink in a perfect map of how the tongue truly appreciates beer.  It'll end in a tiny bit of parched, a gentle but insistent thirst.  Better have another.